Enough with the fake smiles.

I miss you, too.

L-R: Me, Jan-Jan, Michael, Cameh, Chaii, a spot saved for Fran,
 Ronna, Jason, Benny, Railla, Miguel, Ryan, Gerrald, Mae

I mean, U2.

I miss my blockmates. I wonder when we can have another get-together like this one. It's like we're all over the place and we can't even sit for a dinner once in a while. Jan-Jan's in Saudi for his MS, Gerrald's in Singapore for training, Benny's in Canada, and the rest are either working or reviewing for the board exam. Everybody's been so busy and with the exception of Ronna and Mae, who at least I still regularly see, I haven't seen the rest of my blockmates or talk to them, at the very least.

Well, hopefully after the board exam we can have a block dinner again or something. It would be nice to see them again. :)

On another note, I'm looking forward to having dinner with Chaii, Cameh and Ronna this Thursday. We've been planning this for so long and I'm glad we've finally set aside time for it. :)

We're past the point of no return.

Pano kung ayoko na pala? Kung biglang suko na ako?

Things to do After the Board Exam

watch:

• Naruto Shippuuden
• Natsume Yuujinchou San
• Bleach
• Katekyo Hitman Reborn
• Ano Hi Mita Hana
• Nurarihyon no Mago
• Death Note
• Ao no Exorcist
• Detective Conan
• No. 6
• Hunter x Hunter
• Break Blade
• Psych (season 6)
• Game of Thrones (season 1 -2)

read:

• Sophie's World
• Game of Thrones
• Quidditch Through the Ages
• Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

others:

• get passport
• learn how to drive (and get a driver's license)
• apply for job

My things to watch got a little out of hand. And I may have forgotten a few things. I'll get back on this last later. 

"Life wasn't nearly as hard as he'd thought, it was dying that was the hard part. Living when you knew for sure it wasn't forever. That was hard."

(Cinnamon, Beautiful World)

sinabi ko naman sayo na wag na, pero ang kulit mo.

last na yun, ha? lagi ka na lang nasasaktan e.

please lang, teh, tama na, okay?

Maybe you have to stop waiting for someone 

to come along and fix what’s wrong.
Maybe you have to muster all the strength you have
and find the courage to do this on your own.
Maybe sometimes you just have to be your own hero and say: “I can do this”

Not Again

Dear subconscious,

Why?

Why are you doing this to me?

Haven't you ever heard of the phrase "move on"? Why do you have to keep on reminding me of people things I don't want to be reminded of? You are so damn unfair.

It didn't even make sense. Why would I choose... them over hanging out with my high school friends? Why do they even have to be so nice at all?

Sigh. You never listen to me, do you? I'm trying to forget but you keep on forcing me to remember. This is absolutely going nowhere.

Just... leave me be, okay?


Confused and frustrated,
Rachel

かえでーにいちゃん、

私はあなたのすべてを見逃す。



かおり

Of Meteor Showers and Brandies

(This is an overdue post, dated 15th of December 2007. I found this on a piece of paper when I was rummaging my things. Haha.)

2:17 am

Spontaneous parties are the best parties that could ever happen. No programs, no expected visitors, no plans whatsoever. Just pure fun. And it's the third time I drank this school year -- first one this semester. It's Fundador this time. lol

It's close to 5am already... I'm 20 hours awake and still counting... I think I just had a few minute-long eye-shuts and that's all the sleep I got for the night.

Five minutes to 5 and still wide awake. Here I am in McDonalds this early in the morning, acting like some nerd, reading my Psychology book. Yup, I finished the whole goddamned boring chapter.

I had a few shots of brandy diluted in coke last night. And a cup of red wine. I'm not drunk, seriously. Just... sleep deprived, I guess. I look like hell I think. Gah! But the best thing about last night was the meteor shower. It was fun gazing at the night sky, waiting for millisecond-long meteor showers. But I wasn't able to wish for something in the end. Boo. I'm such a loser. >.<

Gah! I'm too tired. Myabe I'm dying. Shit. No way. I wanna go home and get some sleep. Help me. I'm dying. Seriously. I'm starting to look stupid here. Geez, c'mon. I've been here for like, four hours or so. It's getting cold and I want my blanket. I'm getting a bit light-headed. Shit. What am I gonna do? I have a class in three hours. I haven't gone home yet. I haven't had any sleep. And I just want to lie in my bed. Forever, if possible. Wah, I'm writing nonsense. Blch. I wanna take a bath! T.T Toture, bloody torture.

(hahahaha ang sabaw ko lang nito.)